My oldest sister for example. For her sixteenth birthday I got her an engraved ID bracelet, which she broke a couple of months later.

For her eighteenth birthday i got her a custom made music box with her favorite song. For her twenty first birthday... I think I flew out to Louisiana to visit her (or something). Anyway, I'm quickly running out of bigger and better things to top myself with.

I know it's not about the gift itself. Monetary value has nothing to do with it. But I'm not very good with feelings, at least, not with people I care about. I don't like to talk about how I'm feeling, I can't very easily say things. So I show people, through gifts. It's sad and pathetic I know, but it's me. So anyway, my point is, it is extremely hard for me not to spend this money. But I'm trying desperately to pretend like it's not there.

In other, extremely more important news, My mother is very sick. She has a terrible fever, cough, achy.. you know.. the flu. In any case, this is absolutely horrible because she has to fly across the country tomorrow. She was visiting with my sister in South Carolina for Christmas. They didn't get insurance so now she has to go tomorrow, despite being so sick. Also, the new baby doesn't have the best immune system at the moment. If she gets a fever, it could kill her.

The whole christmas break, they didn't go anywhere, they had barely any visitors and especially no kids over. They didn't even go to V's mom-in-law's for Christmas Day because they didn't want the baby to get sick. So everyone is very stressed out. Please pray for my family. That my mom gets home safe and isn't too sick to take the flight. That the baby doesn't get sick and have to go to the hospital. For strength and peace for V and J as they do their best to be good parents of these two young kids. They could use all the help they can get right now.

Thanks.